When I told him about First Wives World, the conversation went like this:

Me: Dad — I've got sort of a writing job. I'm going to be posting on a website.

Dad: That's great! Hold on, let me get Jean on the phone — she's watching Doppler. Jean!

[pause]

Stepmom: Hi!

Dad: She's going to be writing for...what's it for?

Me: A website. It's a site for divorced women.

Stepmom: Really? So what are you going to write about?

Me: Well, you know — getting divorced. Trying to date after getting divorced.

Dad: [throat clearing] So ... if you're writing about dating, that means, er — that means there is dating?

Stepmom: What's the site?

Me: Oh, no. You can't read it.

Dad: But we want to!

Me: No. I'm totally not comfortable with that.

Stepmom: C'mom! We can handle it! We're not old fuddy-duddies!

Me: The fact that you just said that...no way.

Dad: But we want to read your work!

Me in my head: Dad. Jean. I'm going to write about dating. And sex. That means you will be reading about my one-night-stand and how I'm trying to figure out pubic hair grooming expectations. Do you really want to know about that?

Me on the phone: I don't think I'd be able to...speak freely about — certain things — if I knew you were reading.

Dad: [silence]

Stepmom: ...maybe it's for the best that we don't.

Dad: We're proud of you anyway, honey.